Does a non-alcoholic beverage stand a better chance as something that adds too many hops, is too watery, or is filled with dark and brooding malt? I think you see where I'm coming from here: all of the previous incarnations have been pretty bad or downright terrible, and I'm entering this with anticipation of something that will rekindle my belief that the whole NA group can be salvaged.
The liquid is rather thin. I expected more of a stout-like thickness, but this isn't even a porter. The thinness is more like a black ale or a black lager. It's really not black - it's kind of a root beer brown. The head is big bubbles that have no ability to hang around at all. There will be nothing on top or on the sides, sorry. The aroma is chocolate and something vaguely off. Like an old sock drawer.First sip is chocolate and water. The effect isn't terrible, but it's not a beer or anything like it. It's not even thick and creamy with chocolate like an actual chocolate milk. This is to a chocolate stout what a Yoo-hoo is to chocolate milk - it's just not right.
Tip-in is chocolate syrup that is thinner than it sounds but also too sweet for what it should be. The middle brings carbonation to the roof of the mouth while flavor just kind of disappears. The finish is an aggressive resurgence of the flavor with a little smoke added, but it's ultimately unjustified by the rest of the gulp.
Bottom Line: Not great, but better than most of the NA liquids.
2.0/5