Project Almanac (2014)

From now on, all "found footage" style movies should have a giant blinking warning on them in the store, online, and pretty much everywhere. In fact, they should be made of something so flammable that they burst into flames all on their own. Well, I didn't know this was a found footage movie until I started watching it, and I figured I would go ahead and review it.

So, about this movie: ever see the original Butterfly Effect? How about the JCVD classic TimeCop? How about that Simpsons episode where Homer goes back to the dinosaur age and randomly and angrily steps on everything he can? Well, this is a very similar movie in which we delve into the dangers of time travel and creation of paradoxes and the terrible, terrible things that can happen when you change things in the past.

So, we have five kids involved. We have the handsome genius who says things that are blatantly obvious, yet other people keep commenting on how smart he is, so we assume he's a genius. Then we have his sister who only HE can't see is incredibly hot. Let's include two kind of goofy and totally disposable friends who are kind of awkward and sanctimonious. And we will round everything out with a girl who everyone calls the "hot girl." Granted, she's pretty, but the sister is actually distractingly prettier.

For starters, they tried to get technical when they were talking about how they were putting this time machine together, and it was nuts. Some of the things were clearly gibberish, and some of it was so blatantly simplistic that it seemed ridiculous that they would be using it to try to show how complicated this was (and how smart our hero, Jonny Weston is as a result). I mean, he mutters something about nickel-metal hydride immediately after having an issue with the batteries (no, I don't know why they needed to use batteries instead of hooking up to a beefier power supply, but that's the kind of tossed-together crap that we're dealing with) and his buddies are confused about these complicated words that people have been using every day for decades.

The acting is exactly what you would except from these kinds of teen films - kind of lousy, but good enough for this script. Possibly too much for this script, actually. Except for the hot chick, played by Sofia Black D'Elia - she all kinds of sucked (she's been eliminated from the picture to the right). And another thing - you have the hot chick who brings nothing to the table and the sister who is allowed to film events, and that's about it. The two loser guy friends get lots of screen time to contribute and look just smart enough to make Jonny look really, really smart. Way to empower women!

Direction was not good
Acting was not good
Story was very weak
Dialogue was terrible
Special effects were pretty good

Bottom Line: It's not my imagination. Teen movies are getting even worse.

0.5/5

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